Understanding Parental Alienation
For parents who go through a divorce, it is in their best interest and their child’s best interest to remain neutral towards each other and co-parent effectively. A healthy co-parenting relationship ensures that the children can thrive and have a healthy relationship with their parents, despite the changes in the family dynamic. However, this ideal scenario isn’t always a possibility for divorced parents and their children. Sometimes, the relationship between divorced parents can be strained, leading one or both parents to use their child or children as tools in their disputes. This can be incredibly damaging to children and their development, as nothing should come between you and your relationship with your kids. Furthermore, no parent should deal with a co-parent who intentionally undermines that bond.
When a parent chooses to undermine and speak ill of the other parent to change their child’s perception of them, they are engaging in a harmful practice known as parental alienation. Whether they do it knowingly or unknowingly, it is very detrimental to both the other parent and the child. The bond between a parent and their child is incredibly meaningful and is meant to be a relationship that lasts a lifetime. Unfortunately, after divorce in Texas, some parents resort to parental alienation tactics to hurt the other parent, which turns into exploiting their children’s vulnerabilities to manipulate feelings and loyalties. This behavior, often driven by emotions like jealousy or vengeance, is meant to sever the special connection between the child and the targeted parent. Recognizing this behavior is happening is important, as it helps to stop parental alienation from happening by taking proactive steps. By understanding their legal rights, and what parental alienation is, parents can take steps to counter this type of manipulation, thereby protecting both their rights and the well-being of their child caught in this difficult situation.
If you are searching for an experienced Texas parental alienation lawyer near you, contact our Austin child custody lawyer at (737)260-5159 for a consultation.
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What Is Parental Alienation in Texas?
Parental alienation is defined as a situation where someone intentionally tries to damage or undermine a parent’s relationship with their child. This behavior is often carried out by a co-parent, but can also include other family members, such as grandparents, aunts, or uncles. According to a study conducted by the National Society of Collegiate Scholars (NSCS), parental alienation is considered to be a form of emotional child abuse due to its harmful impact on the child’s well-being and relationship with the targeted parent.
While some states have specific legal statutes addressing parental alienation and outlining consequences, Texas does not. Texas family law statutes do not have a clear standard defining what constitutes parental alienation. However, the state does not tolerate parental behaviors that are not in the best interests of the child, including actions that seek to alienate or change a child’s opinion of a parent, as it can be seen as detrimental. Texas family courts consider the totality of the circumstances when parental alienation is claimed. This means that parents who have had their relationship with their child damaged by bad faith conduct from a co-parent can still seek to hold them accountable for their actions. This makes it essential to have a knowledgeable Texas family lawyer, like Eric M. Willie, on your side to help prove these actions to prevent or stop parental alienation.
What Are The Symptoms of Parental Alienation?
Several signs can be seen from either a parent or a child that indicate that parental alienation is being used. Recognizing these signs early is important for the targeted parent, as it will allow them to step in quickly to prevent or stop the alienation from escalating any further and try to repair the damage that has already been done. Whether through a straightforward conversation to address the behavior or by pursuing legal action, being aware of these key indicators empowers the targeted parent to take the necessary steps to protect their relationship with their child and ensure their mental and emotional well-being.
Talking Negatively in Front Of The Child
Speaking negatively about one parent in front of the child is a common sign of parental alienation. This behavior often involves one parent complaining about or blaming the other in an attempt to influence the child’s perception of their parent. For instance, a parent may say, “We can’t spend the day together because your dad wants you all to themselves,” or make similar statements that create a negatively biased view of the other parent. Making negative remarks about the other parent can cause emotional harm and is intended to undermine the child’s relationship with the other parent.
Asking About The Other Parent’s Life
Another sign of parental alienation is when one parent frequently asks the child about the other parent’s personal life to gather information to use against them. Questions could include asking about the other parent’s dating life, financial choices, or even day-to-day activities. By doing this, the parent is putting the child in a difficult position, forcing them to spy or report on the other parent’s actions, essentially. This not only creates tension between the parent and child but can also make the child feel torn between their parents, which can further damage their relationship with the other parent.
Frequently Breaking Custody Rules
Another sign of parental alienation is the frequent bending or breaking of custody guidelines by one parent to go against the other parent. This can be done in various ways, such as proposing fun activities they know the child won’t want to miss out on during the other parent’s designated visitation time. For instance, a parent might say, “We are going to the water park this weekend, I want you to come with us” This creates a conflict for the child, placing them in a position where they may feel guilty for wanting to participate in activities while foregoing their time with the other parent.
Additionally, a parent trying to alienate the other might exhibit inflexibility regarding custody agreements. For example, if Christmas falls on a day designated for the other parent, the alienating parent may refuse to accommodate any request to allow the child to be there on Christmas, insisting that the schedule remain unchanged. These tactics not only disrupt established routines, which are important for young children but also foster feelings of loyalty conflict in the child, furthering the alienator’s agenda.
Child Is Angry With The Non-Alienating Parent
Another indication of parental alienation is when children display sudden anger toward a parent without any apparent reason. For instance, after spending time with their other parent, a child may come home angry and lash out, leaving you puzzled about why they are feeling this way. This behavior might stem from the other parent’s influence, who could be sharing negative information or unfounded accusations about you, such as claims of neglect or simply lying about various things. Additionally, children are perceptive and may mimic the anger or resentment they observe in their other parent, causing them to adopt similar attitudes and reactions. Such shifts in behavior can indicate a troubling attempt to alienate the child from the targeted parent.
Making The Child Choose One Parent Over The Other
Another clear sign of parental alienation is when one parent forces a child to choose between them and the other parent. This most often happens in situations where the alienating parents want the child to choose which parent they want to live with permanently. This situation can take many forms, such as asking them which parent they love more. For example, a parent might tell a child, “If you loved me, you wouldn’t want to spend time with your dad,” or say, “I’ve done so much for you, but your other parent doesn’t care about you.” These tactics put children in an impossible position, making them feel anxious, guilty, and confused, as they are torn between their love for both parents. This manipulative behavior creates emotional distress for a child, damaging their self-esteem and their relationship with both parents.
Can I Call CPS For Parental Alienation?
In some cases, you can call Child Protective Services (CPS) if you believe parental alienation is taking place, but it’s important to weigh the circumstances carefully. Here are a few key considerations to make before calling CPS for parental alienation:
- Impact on the child – CPS will focus on how parental alienation affects the child’s overall physical and emotional well-being, rather than just the allegations of alienation itself.
- Alternatives – Family therapy or seeking legal assistance might be more effective options for addressing parental alienation than involving CPS, as the outcome of calling CPS may not be what you desire.
- Complexity – Parental alienation can be harmful, but its effects are often less obvious than other forms of abuse or neglect, making it harder for CPS to intervene and change the situation.
- Court involvement – In some cases, courts may involve psychologists or modify custody and visitation arrangements to address alienation, if it can be proven.
- Legal recognition – While some experts view parental alienation as a serious form of child abuse, there is no specific criminal law against alienating behavior, therefore if the child is not in danger, being abused, or neglected then CPS may not be able to intervene.
If you’re unsure whether to contact CPS, consulting with a child custody attorney, like Eric M. Willie, can help you determine the best course of action.
Contact an Experienced Texas Parental Alienation Lawyer Near You
If you are searching for an experienced Texas parental alienation lawyer near you, contact our Austin child custody lawyer at (737)260-5159 for a consultation.
If you believe your child’s other parent is attempting to alienate you from your child, it’s important to act quickly to prevent any further damage to your relationship. Parental alienation can have long-term emotional impacts on your relationship with your child, making it harder to repair over time. Don’t hesitate to contact Eric M. Willie, a skilled child custody attorney in Austin, who has experience handling cases where a parent is trying to alienate their child. Eric M. Willie understands the complexities of parental alienation and can help you take legal action to protect your parental rights and preserve your bond with your child, as well as their best interests.
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